The Best of 2011

Counting down the best of 2011.

17. The sousaphone

16. Bean bag chairs

15. Qi gong tui na

14. The New Astrology: A Unique Synthesis of the World's Two Great Astrological Systems: The Chinese and Western

14. The Last Unicorn

13. Abaci

12. Muddlers

11. S'mores brownie pie

10. Sleepy

9. Dopey

8. Doc

7. Blitzen

6. Comet

5. Dr. Pepper for men

4. 103.5 KTU

3. Periwinkle blue

2. Canned tuna

1. Please consider the environment before printing this list.

Christmas Dinner Menu

This year I volunteered to cook Christmas dinner. Why, you ask? Because I'm a great daughter. And because I've been doing nothing but gorging myself on my dad's cooking since I got home.

After much deliberation, I think I've settled on the perfect menu. This menu is sure to please as well as conceal any amateur mistakes that may arise.

The BLT Prime Popover
This soft and flavorful bread course will no doubt evoke great memories of when my brother and I enjoyed the delicious popovers at BLT Prime earlier this year. Of course my sure-to-be somewhat burnt and flat popovers will be all my own.

Pork Tenderloin Stuffed with Spinach, Mushrooms, and Gruyere
This piece of meat will no doubt be enjoyed by the whole family, a family that doesn't always appreciate the pork belly for being too "fatty". And a stuffing of spinach, mushrooms, and cheese - all of which are inherently juicy - will mask the dryness of the pork itself.

Roast Fingerling Potatoes
A step up from our typical mashed potatoes. They might or might not end up mashed by individuals.

Broccoli and Peppercorn Drizzled with Cheese
Obligatory vegetable dish. But made better with cheese!

We'll see if this actually happens. My mind's been changing every other day, so check back with me to find out if I cooked or if we just ordered Dominoes.

Aloneliness

You end up getting to know yourself a little better once you're comfortable facing the judging stares of society. I say that in both the literal and metaphorical sense.

I had dinner by myself for the first time this year. It's been a whole of mine for a while to have dinner by myself in a sit-down restaurant with waiter service without reading material or any sort of distractions. I know it's a strange desire. Most people use going out as a way to enjoy the company of others.

I chose an easy restaurant where this type of dining is common. I had my dinner in the restaurant of a hotel while I was on a business trip, and I was able to cross this goal off my list.

Tonight, I had dinner by myself again (though I was smarter and brought reading material). This time, it was in a restaurant where dining by yourself is not a common occurrence, as I deciphered from the surprised look on my hostess's face. Yet I felt completely comfortable eating alone. It's probably because I had already done it once this year, but the glances at my table from both waiters and other diners didn't bother me.

From this experience, I realized that sometime during the past 5 years, being alone and being lonely no longer mean the same thing to me. My feelings of loneliness only creep back on occasion as I become more and more comfortable with the thought of being alone. I used to enjoy being alone because I needed to recharge from social situations, but it was inevitable that the feeling of loneliness would return. Yet I've now come to better appreciate being alone because I know that I won't be alone for long.

This experience helps me better understand what it means to be my own person. There's a very thin line between defying social norms and becoming an outcast, but hopefully I haven't yet stepped to the side of being a social outcast. I just want to find ways of not being bound by what everybody else says is the right thing to do. Even if it's being able to enjoy a Reuben sandwich while reading Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson.

Acceptance

It's funny how things have a way of working out sometimes. There always feels like there's a sense of destiny to the world.

My best friend's getting married soon, and her mom was telling me the story of her mother-of-the-bride dress fiasco. Her original hot pink dress which would've made her look super stunning never came in. The store had ordered her the wrong dress and wouldn't order her a new one for complicated reasons that I'll leave unexplained. So here we are two months before the wedding and no dress.

She ended up going to this other store where dresses were altered and sold off the rack. There was no ordering involved. And she found an even better dress that fit her style for $100 less. This is where the story got good because there was genuine excitement at the great find. The best part is she already has the dress in her possession since it doesn't have to be ordered.

I've been thinking a lot lately about the progress and consequence of events. Sometimes, all you can do is keep an open mind and hope for the best. Had my friend's mom negatively reacted to the dress situation, she would never have found an even better alternative. Instead, she took initiative and opened up to other options. And perhaps it's best to just have a little faith that in the end things always sort themselves out.

The Unassuming Dentist

If I hadn't been going to the same dentist for approximately 23 years, or since whatever age you start taking your children to the dentist, I'd most definitely be freaked out by the whole experience here.

As you come down the heavily trafficked road, you'll notice (actually, you probably won't notice) a fully stuccoed building that looks like it should've been torn down years ago. The fabric has long disappeared from the rusting awning structure, and the parking lot has knee-high plants growing from the pavement whose cracked pattern almost mimics a spider web's design.

This is where we turn in.

Then it becomes a fun game of avoiding the weed patches to get to the back of the building. The parking lines are barely visible, but no one pays attention to them anyway. There's always the one guy who parks perpendicular to everybody else, but it doesn't matter because there are only two or three other cars there at any given time. Four if you count the rusting pickup in the back of the lot. I always wonder who are the other people crazy enough to come to this building. And what purpose do they have here?

And you'd wonder too when, as you're walking up the rickety stairs, you see only one sign that indicates the building is occupied at all - Dr. Larry Chen, D.D.S. However, the waiting room has one other patient, at most, so the question of who the other people in the buildig are and why they're here will remain forever unsolved.

But once you walk into Dr, Larry Chen's office, the feeling changes. Sure, the fake wood panels on the walls left over from when it was popular in the 70s still remain, but you can't help but agree that it fits here. And if you don't pay attention to the children's drawings on the wall, many of which are dated pre- '92, making these colorful scribbles the sole indication of the feelings these "children" once had towards their dentist.

The drawings deserve to remain. Because Dr. Larry Chen is quite the dentist. He may not have the latest high tech dentist gadgetry, but he does a good clean and actually cares about his patients. He's asked me questions about my Barbies, my high school clubs, my college major, and now the traveling I do for my job. He makes sure everyone is comfortable, and he'd probably still let me pick out of the 20 year old treasure chest if he knew I still had a secret desire to do so, in the hopes of scoring a finger puppet or a coveted ball and paddle.

Detailed Description of this Saturday's Work Schedule

1. Pull up most recent Word doc with partially written case study that was not finished due to the gorgeous weather on Friday
2. Crack knuckles to mean business
3. Open report that case study references
4. Type one full worded sentence riddled with business jargon
5. Check to make sure the word "align" hadn't been used in the prior 3 sentences
6. Start next sentence
7. "I wonder where I can get Guinness ice cream" ~friend
8. Google [Guinness ice cream] (phrase match, obvi)
9. Stumble upon AccidentalHedonist.com
10. Read several articles on beer
11. Get inspired to blog
12. Open up Blogger without a real topic to talk about so start creating a chronological list
13. Realize it's been 30 minutes since the last half constructed sentence for case study
14. "Do you want to see Brittany's new tattoo?" ~friend

And here we are. I think I need the constructs of an office to really get anything done. However, I am feeling rather like a literary arteest with my laptop and lemonade at the local Panera. It's the look that counts, right?

A Culture All Its Own

Office politics exist - I'm not naive enough to believe that it doesn't. However, I do believe that managers can single-handedly affect the level of office politics within a team based on their own biases.

It's not enough to want to avoid office politics for your team. Just because a manager doesn't want office politics doesn't mean office politics will be completely ignored. A manager needs to physically set the example and demonstrate that office politics will not be tolerated. Anything that can me construed as gossip and is damaging to a person's character needs to be actively stricken from everyday conversation.

I bring this up because I've gotten into a situation recently where office politics is clearly in play. For me, it's almost become a fascinating study of human nature as I watch things unfold from a somewhat active sideline position. I know one party in question sees things through the lens of needing to play in the game of office politics. That there's even a strategic game to play. From this point of view, there's no way everyone else won't get sucked into the gameplay as well. Everything move is deliberated on, an intricate game of chess where some pawns don't even know they're playing. I'm lucky enough to have been brought into the know so that at least I understand I'm a part of the game.

I personally approach this situation as a course that needs to be studied. I've unintentionally enrolled in a school of manipulation, but I don't regret it. I believe that in order to know how to avoid or at least limit involvement in office politics, it's necessary to understand when it's happening and what the rules are. Otherwise you'll (unknowingly!) be dragged back and forth by the people who are really controlling the situation. Manipulating the puppet strings, if you will. And I refuse to be played like that.

However, I still believe it's best to steer clear of derogatory statements about coworkers no matter how tempting it would be to bitch and complain. I've given into temptation in the past, but I try to remember that I don't often see the full picture, and misunderstandings often occur simply because everyone's approaching the situation with different backgrounds. The key to avoiding office politics is to keep all defamatory opinions away from those not involved. If something really needs to be said, it should be said to the other party directly, a manager, or an HR representative.

Business runs with its own social constructs. If I had gotten into social psychology, this would be where I would focus most of my studies. It's definitely a fascinating area that's really difficult to study because not too many companies would allow a social psychologist within their midst to expose such intimate secrets about company culture and behavior. Maybe this is what I'll focus on when I write my post-retirement book.

And I realize this post is littered with cliché analogies (puppetmaster?? game of chess??) but I felt it was appropriate because these are totally acceptable/expected when writing emails or notes for around the office.

Query-based Marketing

It's been a while since I've gotten this question, but my dad and I were recently talking about my job again. He turned to me, like he's done in the past, and asked once again, "What exactly do you do?" So I tried to keep it simple and replied that my job is to put text ads on Google. And very practically, he responded, "Your job will probably become obsolete."

The more I tried to justify my job, the more I realized putting ads on Google or Bing is just a small fraction of what I do. Thus, I think it's time to ditch the name Search Engine Marketing (SEM). It's gotten to the point where this old title is too restrictive when compared to what search engine marketers actually do. In their never-ending quest for information, people are moving beyond the search engine for research. If you compare Google to all of the other ways people are searching out there rather than just the big three search engines, I'll be you'll find that Google has actually been losing market share.

Query-based Marketing (QBM) is a more appropriate name for the practice. The goal of query-based marketing is maintaining presence wherever people are searching, whether it's on a search engine or something else. Whenever someone is looking for information, a brand should be where it's relevant.

With a new name like Query-based Marketing, the marketer's goal is not just to optimize the most cost efficient ad on a search engine. It's much grander than that. I think the goal is to manage sponsored pull-marketing opportunities, where searchers are already requesting content about a product or service. This opens up the future for SEM, where marketers get better at predicting questions before someone even asks it. It looks like I'm about to get into the premonition business.

Perhaps this is one of those "a rose by any other name.." scenarios, but there have been times when a simple name change affected the whole goal of an operation. And if that's the only outcome of a name change, I'm already on board with it.

Is There Room for Introversion in the Workplace?

In a world where extroverts outnumber introverts 3:1 (according to The Introvert Advantage), how does an introvert stand out in the workplace?

Being an introvert means several things to me: needing to be alone and recharge after being in highly social situations, spending a lot of time analyzing situations internally rather than talking it out, and preferring to stand on the outskirts rather than being at the center of attention. It does not mean being shy or antisocial, though that can be the case sometimes. I'm not antisocial; in fact, I enjoy meeting and talking to new people. But, I do find myself having to take some alone time before being able to hang out again.

The question of introversion in the workplace arises from a recent situation, where I realized I might've benefited more by talking to other people rather than analyzing everything in my head by myself. I often trust my own analyses and emerge confident in my own conclusions after weighing all of the pros and cons rationally. I do sometimes talk things through with my friends, but not before I've already given it a considerable amount of thought. However, the disadvantage of internal debate is that I'm only analyzing based on information I have... and not everything is always how it seems.

When you work in a team environment, perhaps it's not the best method to keep feelings inside. I'm not afraid to discuss facts, but I didn't believe that feelings should be involved in business. However, when you work so closely with your teammates, it's unfair to keep them in the dark all of the time, especially if you're friends with them. And I think this is something I've just recently come to understand - that I don't have to rely on myself. Why can I trust my teammates with business problems, but I can't trust them with life concerns? I don't mean that I should unleash all of my crazy, but I need to learn to trust in others if I expect them to place their trust in me.

I often look to Douglas Conant, the CEO of Campbell's, when this question crosses my mind. He was a guest speaker at my school once, and he mentioned that he's an introvert. I haven't quite figured out how he's able to hold a position that requires him to constantly express both his vision and his concerns, but I believe that I'll eventually find a managing style that suits who I am and still gets things done. Each new situation is a learning experience.

My Relationship with Brands

It just took me over 20 minutes to look up the name of my Management & Organizational Analysis professor, but I finally emerged victorious (working in search really hones your sleuthing skills). The reason I was Googling Reinhard Bachmann was because I wanted to admit that I finally understand the importance of his book Trust Within and Between Organizations. I never thought I'd actually be using information from my MOA class. It seemed like a colossal waste of time the whole time I was taking it (and long after), but I find myself thinking about the lessons more and more these days.

The personification of brands is not an uncommon practice. Ronald McDonald is the first example that comes to mind. But the difference between the brands of yore and the brands today is that today our information about brands come from a multitude of locations. Even though some people might find Ronald McDonald creepy, our image of him is still something carefully crafted by the wizards at McDonald's Corporation. And for the longest time, Ronald equaled McDonald's; when someone thought of McDonald's, Ronald was not far behind. Fast forward a couple of years, and Ronald is no longer the first thing people think of. With today's access to information, the customer service, the sustainability of the food, Supersize Me, and Ronald all hold keys to determining McDonald's brand in the minds of its stakeholders. Now if I were to personify McDonald's, Ron English's fat Ronald is more on target than the kind Ronald in charge of Ronald McDonald House Charities.


Which one is more on brand?

I believe that brand personification has a new meaning these days. It's not just about creating a character for your brand. Aunt Jemima, Mr. Clean, and Eddie from Accounting are no longer the sole brand reps. The new brand character is the imaginary person you invent in your head when you combine all of the information you've learned about a brand. BP might claim it's a green company, but in my mind BP is a woman who claims she has a compost heap but in reality just throws all her trash in her neighbor's yard.

This is where I start thinking about how trust plays into today's world of brand definition. If a corporation says one message through its marketing channels, but somehow consumers experience another message, trust in the brand decreases. In order to gain the consumers' trust, a company has to make sure that the brand message from all angles is consistent. That doesn't mean making sure advertising campaigns match what's in the corporate press releases. I mean taking the time to ensure that actions match the words. Would anybody ever trust a person who promised to help move furniture while running quickly in the opposite direction? No. Then why would anyone trust a company that does the same thing?

If a company manages to earn trust, consumers (aka the trusting party) will be more willing to allow the feeling of vulnerability and follow a company as it grows. I know that people make mistakes so I'm willing to forgive and forget if someone I trust fucks up occasionally. If someone I don't trust screws up, that just reinforces the belief that I shouldn't trust that person. I hold corporations to the same standard.

The role of search and social influence marketing is becoming more important in determining the brand character people build in their minds and in helping corporations maintain consistent brand messaging. Both of these channels are able to interact with people just as they're thinking about the brand. The power of search ads comes from their ability to address needs at the exact time someone wants answers. Twitter and the likes take that to the next level by allowing direct communication with the brand. JetBlue understands that. Zappos understands that. Intel sorta gets it but still mostly pushes corporate news.

So my one bit of advice is to be true to who you are. People will appreciate the honesty. Don't pretend to be someone you're not because you will always be found out in the end.

Home is Where Your Rump Rests

It may seem like my musings and ponderings have petered out, but I assure you, anonymous reader, that that is not the case. I just haven't had as much time to write lately with all of the work/good weather/couch naps I've been having.

But here I am today, and I would like to discuss the subject of the flighty living in New York. I just got back from a really rigorous round of negotiations (my roommate did most of the talking. I just nodded along) I had with my leasing office mad early in the morning (10:30 AM). Coming back, I realize just how little I've felt at home in New York in the past 6 years.

It's not that I don't call my various places of living "home". I like that I have a place to sleep at night, that I have a really expensive storage area for all of my stuff. But most of my important pieces of mail still go to the house where I grew up. I still have trouble saying "my parents' house" because I still consider that my house. I can still sit on the floor of my empty old bedroom (most things, including my bed, have been moved into the city) and feel like I belong there.

I wonder if this feeling is one that I alone experience or if it's a product of living in a place where you're ready to pick up and leave in one or two years. Perhaps this feeling is less pronounced when you buy an apartment or if you're settled down in a long term relationship, but for those who have neither of those, it's so easy to get swept up into the temporariness of all life in the city. Stores change hands all of the time. Your favorite bar could be there one day and gone the next. And if your rent gets jacked up, you're out the door looking for a new apartment. I have yet to live in an apartment for more than a year.

The ability to pick up and move at any second is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, I don't even know where I'll end up in the next couple of years, so having temporary housing is preferable. Yet it still definitely adds to the feeling that I'm just another urban nomad until I can find a place to really call home.

This I Believe

I think that we are all a product of our choices. At this exact moment, each person is the sum of all of his/her previous choices in life. Forget about both nurture and nature for a moment, and you realize that everybody is just the physical embodiment of their own histories.

Consequently, each previous choice affects the availability of subsequent choices. For example, if I were backpacking through Europe, at any given moment I could choose to go left, right, straight, or back. But I could not choose to go to Australia with the very next step. It'll take multiple steps to get to Australia from Europe. The same goes for life choices. If I decide to talk to a person, I can choose the topic of conversation, and I can choose not to talk to that person anymore, but I can't choose to go back to the time when I hadn't talked to that person.

I believe that in this way, we are all confined to a certain fate. I don't mean a fate that's dictated by a greater being but rather one that's forced upon us because of the limitations resulting from our life choices. With each decision, the permutations of the future are altered.

Perhaps "decisions" is not the right word to use because often things that happen to us are not decisions of our own. Our own actions are affected by multiple variables including genes and the actions of others which also end up limiting the way our own life can play out. Which means we don't exactly have the ability to control the way our life shapes out. Environmental factors make up a large percentage of our future actions. Though at the same time, we can definitely take some initiative to influence how those environmental factors can impact our lives. That's why the same single event can happen to two different people with two very different outcomes.

I have no regrets in the actions that have taken me to where I am right now. I was lucky a lot of factors that I can't control actually worked in my favor, such as growing up with a supportive family in a great neighborhood. I was lucky that my genes make me very receptive to facing challenges, which I think has made me more resourceful and open to new ideas. And I tend to live life without any regrets because I'm pretty happy with my current situation in life, which means everything I've done in the past has somehow worked itself out to bring me to this exact moment in life.

~Post inspired by NPR's This I Believe~

Yes... and

Improv class has been more difficult than I expected. I thought that the moment I understood the rules, all I'd have to do is practice and be okay at it.. at least good enough to crudely apply the rules to whatever scenes I have to put on. What I didn't anticipate was that some of the exercises have me act the opposite way of how I usually act. For example, one of the rules (or best practices, to use some business jargon) is to always agree with your scene partner so that the story can continue. It wouldn't be funny if one person said one thing and the next person just completely negated the first statement. While trying to practice this rule, I realized that I disagree with people more often than I thought I did. As a generally positive (at least from my own perspective) person, this realization has caused me to become more aware of how what I saw affects the options others have when replying.

Another noticeable change after just a couple of classes is the change in my desire to hold questions and information to myself. I'm typically one who spends a lot of time thinking of the perfect question or the right thing to say. While it seems like I've pretty much embodied the over-used piece of advice "look before you leap," such a personality doesn't always work in the fast-paced world of advertising. Being able to react more quickly to situations and to just throw out idea after idea is also an advantage. With a class like improv, I think I'll be able to learn to step out of my comfort zone and speak up more often.

Lastly, I'm feeling much more natural when in front of people. I've been performing on stage since I was little, but theater/acting/talking in front of people has always felt more intimate than dancing. And then coming up with lines right on the spot makes it almost seem as if I have an audience that's judging a conversation I'm trying to have with someone I don't know. Very intimidating.

Overall, it's been a very positive experience so far. I'm looking forward performing next month!

Materialism

Somehow the cell phone companies have taught us that it's okay to throw away phones after two years of use. It was different when the phones were cheap with very few features. Getting a new phone every couple of years meant the difference between a monochromatic and a colored screen.

But now phones are all about how many features can we stuff into them. And people look forward to the two year anniversary of their contract signing because that means swapping one expensive phone for another equally expensive phone. Or some don't even wait until their contracts end and just drop the $100+ to cancel. Are the new features really worth it?

I upgraded from a pay as you go flip phone to an iPhone a year ago. Best decision ever. But I'm really hoping this phone will last longer than two years because that upgrade made a serious dent in my wallet. I have yet to find another phone that will radically change the marketplace after the iPhone.

Though... that new Google phone looks damn good.

Resolutions

I can't believe it's already 2010. I remember thinking 2000 would never arrive. But I'm ready to tackle this new year.

I've also never been one to make New Year's resolutions. I feel less pressured to succeed when I simply just constantly seek to improve myself. I have several goals that I would like to complete, but I've never held myself to a time period of a year, nor do I usually wait until January 1st before starting a goal.

I'm pretty excited about my three recent goals. One of the main reasons I moved into the city was to meet new people and continue to overcome my desire to stay within my comfort zone. Several of the ideas I had to fulfill this goal was to take improv classes, cooking classes, walk-in art classes; to join Toastmasters; and/or to volunteer. I'm happy to say that I went through New York Cares orientation last month, and I start improv classes at the end of January.

Improv classes have always been on my list of fun ways to improve myself. Not only will I be laughing and entertaining people, I'll be gaining some presentation skills that others have often told me I need to develop. I've taken a presentation class, and while I learned a lot, I don't think a second similar class will help me as much. So my choices were either to participate with Toastmasters or sign up for improv classes. I opted for the more fun one and the one that I could deceive myself into thinking it's not entirely a way to improve my workplace skills.

A third goal that I've been meaning to complete since moving into my new apartment was to paint my temporary wall. I've been telling myself to wait for winter when there'll most certainly be a weekend where I won't want to leave my apartment. This opportunity arrived today. I got up this morning and decided to spend the last day of my "winter break" constructing a mural.

The wall didn't turn out quite as I had planned it, but I'm pleased with the outcome and will be able to live with it for the next two years or so. And it's nice being able to check something off my list of things I want to do.

The Plan (plotted out using Photoshop)


The Result


Now I'm off to continue enjoying the new year.

New Hobby? Perhaps!

I bought myself an early Christmas present thinking that I'd take up photography. It's been a while since my digital artwork days. Drawing takes more time than I have available to dedicate towards it. So I thought photography would be an viable substitute.

And thus.. my Tumblr (http://sshu.tumblr.com/)! I'm still not sure why the thought of photography inspired me to sign up for Tumblr, but here we are. I'm thinking I'll periodically post my best photos. Hopefully it'll be a log that allows me to see progression in the years to come as I learn what all of these manual settings mean, composition, lighting, and all of that fun stuff. I've never taken a photography class so this is going to be a trial and error experiment. Perhaps I'll even post new lessons as I find them online. So far the Nikon Learn & Explore iPhone app has been a great starting point.

And here is my first Tumblr post.

Redundant to have it here too, but I really love the lights my roommate and I put up. I thought I'd share it to get everyone more into the holiday mood.

More to come.

Confidence is Key

Being a successful expert is half about knowing the material you're supposed to be an expert at and half about coming off as an expert. Every expert has moments where he doesn't know the material, but that doesn't make him any less of an expert.

The above lesson is a paraphrased version of two pieces of advice I received today. It's also a very difficult lesson for me to learn. There are definitely times when I'm certain I know my material and can easily answer any questions asked. I don't complain about those.

But I stumble when I'm not confident enough about the extent of my knowledge on a particular subject matter. This could mean anything, from something I barely glanced at to something I extensively researched. When I'm not confident, it's much more difficult for me to sound like an expert. And when I hear myself faltering, I can't help but stumble and stammer after every question asked. It becomes almost a self-fulfilling prophecy. The expectation that I will come off as a fool actually causes me to eventually come off as a fool.

The solution, logically, is to convince myself that I'm actually quite knowledgeable and will do fine in the spotlight. Of course this is always easier said than done. How often do people try and fail at convincing themselves of certain opinions? And then there's also the danger of succeeding too much and ending up with narcissism. I don't think narcissism is a problem for me, but that could also be the pride talking.

Yet I know it's possible to complete. I know this because I'm often the subject of my own psychological experiments. I have already tried to convince myself of several things, and in each case, by pretending to be something I thought I wasn't, I ended up being just what I wanted to be. For example, I used to believe I couldn't tell stories. But after telling myself to pretend to be a good story teller and fool the crowd into thinking I can actually tell stories, I ended up as a better storyteller than when I first started. The pretending actually made me better at something I wanted to improve.

At least there's still hope yet. I have plenty of time to pretend as if I'm good at something. I'll talk with a more authoritative voice. I won't shy away from eye contact. And from all this pretending, I'm hoping I'll actually turn into an expert, or at least fulfill the appearance half of coming off as an expert.

Voila! I turn crap into prettier crap.

No one will ever say a New Yorker has no ability turning garbage into art.



NYC filled Times Square with lawn chairs. A whole bunch of fatasses broke said lawn chairs. Pioneering artist ties lawn chairs together with cable ties and calls it art.

Amazing.

The Great Wall

The latest news is that I'm getting the keys to my new apartment today! Very excite.

It's a one bedroom, but my roommate and I are converting it to a two. Which means we went out and leased a wall. Did you know you could lease walls? Like people come in, construct a wall, and then take it down when you no longer want it anymore. This is still a novel idea for me.

This opens up a huge range of possibilities. Such as ditching the standard door and installing saloon doors for dramatic entrances every time. Or installing four walls for a small square room in the middle of the living room. Or requesting a garage door and playing Indiana Jones or Ali Baba every time you want to enter and exit the room.

Multiple people warned me of the impracticalities of straying from the standard wall/standard door combo, though, so I went with the boring and mundane choice. But that still allows me the option of decorating my wall. I haven't yet decided what I want to do with it. Wall decals seem all the rage, but I'm having trouble accepting the option of paying money for something I can paint myself. Perhaps I'll Tom Sawyer it and have a wall painting party and have people finger paint abstract pieces.

Any ideas?

Edibles

The New Yorkers and foodies will know just how wonderful a discovery I have made. My dad just bought a new grill, and I've learned that I can make Cuban grilled corn - a la Cafe Habana. Found the recipe online.

I made a couple of changes to the recipe. Instead of cayenne pepper powder/chili powder, I used Tobasco chipotle sauce (couple of dribbles before putting on the mayo and sour cream mixture). And because I didn't have Cotija cheese, I shredded some Monterey Jack and hoped for the best. But the best idea I had was adding some garlic powder to the sour cream and mayo concoction. Most other recipes called for garlic butter, so I decided to mix the two ideas for an even fattier (read: tastier) treat.

No pictures of the results, but you can bet the corn was effing delicious. Grilled until the husks burned off. Topped off with more lime juice than was necessary. Yum.

Burgers were involved too, but the corn definitely overshadowed the burgers. I'll have more time to experiment with different burger flavors in the future now that I've figured out I don't have to wait in line forever to get Cuban grilled corn.