Now that Labor Day is coming to a close, it's hard to ignore the telltale signs that summer is about to end. The days are getting shorter. The air is feeling chillier and crisper. And the kids are wailing about having to go back to school.
I was recently in a college dorm room helping my brother move in. The twin long beds, the broken closet doors, and the cinderblock walls brought back very recent memories. And while I never lived in a room surrounded by cinderblocks, and I broke my own closet door in favor of a makeshift beer pong table, but twin long beds - the epitome of college furniture - really bring me back to all of the dorm rooms I've lived in these past four years.
It's strange that I'm not going back to school this year. After four years of performing the moving in comedy routine, I've finally retired and passed on my role to my brother. And I have to go back to work just like any other day. The full realization that I'm going to be doing this for the rest of my life has finally hit me. I'm going to be attending to my cubicle farm for the next couple of years. I might go back to grad school, but there's only a 50% chance of that happening (which means I don't know either way). There's also the possibility that I might be a drone for the rest of my life. Don't get me wrong; I love what I do, but even thinking the term "rest of my life" gives me the shivers. I almost want to go back to school just to make sure that there are some changes in my life.
No, I won't be going off to classes tomorrow. But at least I can still buy myself new clothes and stationary with the salary that I've gathered since graduation. It'll almost be like I'm starting the school year again.
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I feels ya! I can't tell you how many times I said today that for the first time in 16 years, I'm not going back to school. It is frightening. Something about the missing structure, the built in know-when-they're-coming holidays, the sense of a large community. All of it is missing. And most of all, the prospects for meeting new people. My sister started middle school today (a time in my life which draws on all but pleasant memories, yet with enough rummaging through my drawer of flashbacks, can make me muster up some nostalgia), some friends went back to school, while others were just starting their college experience, a time already inscribed into my life's "biblical past" as the Golden Age. My answer, and it may just be a way of coping than an intuitive summation of our emotions right now, is that we are still in transition. What we can do, however, is try to make this new lifestyle as enjoyable as the last one. So... WINGS NIGHT!
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